Hiatus? I think my status is hiatus 🤣🤣🤣

Hey~ to anyone who is reading this.
Although I'm not sure who will read this but yea, I'm currently on hiatus because I have been trying to build my own craft business from things that I like to make.

I've thought about it lots of times and I am confirmed that I was absolutely unhappy when people praised my face or body instead of my crafts. Well. It is definitely nice once in awhile to be praise because of how you look.....but everytime? When I posted photos or cosplay photos, people forget to see my costumes.

In fact, sometimes it felt like I had to include my face so that people will at least see the photos. Such sadness.

I came to the conclusion that I dislike fame or money build up by my "sexy" photos. Honest opinion? I wonder why only females are being objectified? I tried to change it and get out but I came to notice the change in the direction of the cosplay society recently. I am very sad for the new cosplayers. And I wish to get out of the "sexy cosplayers" label but yet still do what I like. I do love cosplay but I'm starting to lost that feeling after consistent pressure from the society. It's felt like I'm torn apart from two different sides.

Ones that wishes me to stop cosplaying and ones that wishes me to do more "sexy" photos. I want neither. I just want to enjoy photos of myself looking like a fairy, a vampire, a psychic student, a heroine, a school idol, an angel, or somebody who holds a weapon-like with awesome moves that I can't really be in reality.

I will never stop cosplaying but I would love to exit the cosplay scene. I want to disappear and appear whenever I want. Not having to answer to anyone. I will cosplay whenever I feel like it. I will cosplay whatever or whoever I want to. I am going to ignore anyone who ask me to "cosplay this" or "cosplay that". I will also ignore anyone who ask me "when is the next cosplay". I will also ignore anyone who ask me to post more photos. I believe I have no obligations to follow what people want from me. I don't think it's a must for me to reply text messages from strangers too. I still do reply though whenever I feel like it.

Selling a high definition photo for 2 usd was the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life. Never gonna do that again. Consistent printing of cosplay photobooks and prints for only these 4 people was and is still very time and money taxing. I am still doing it because they were the only ones who sees me as a person rather than "just another sexy girl". (I hope)

Printing cosplay prints and photobooks for hundreds over people is actually much more easier than printing for a handful of people. Would always wonder why did I agree to start printing my cosplay photos. I am still wondering what do people do with my photos? Since the beginning, lol.

I can't get an answer but lately I was able to find something that I could do and people could put it into good use; my crafts. I love crafting, the main reason why I started cosplaying. I came to like crafting little cute things too. Reality check. I can't give big because I need to eat and survive in this world that's ruled by currency. So now I am building a path for more cosplay cosplans by selling my small little cute crafts. Being able to sell them gives me a reason to make more and I enjoy every crafting moments. It's a win-win situation for me~ So if you don't see me posting cosplay photos, it means that I am busy crafting them cute little stuff.

Carpal Tunnel syndrome has hindered my lifestyle since 2 years ago. Teared many times, all that depression and frustration but I was never stuck. I couldn't not do anything. It is still with me now..... but I am still moving on. Life has been whacking the shit out of me but I am so glad that I did not give up. I hope I can continue to be a tough bitch. lol.

okay bye.
I am currently so damn busy batch making instock for my booth in Doujinma.
So yea, I will post again whenever I feel like it.